Soft top owners set for three days of year when it's not a total waste of money

BRITAIN’S convertible owners are set to enjoy the 72 hour annual period where they do not feel idiotic for buying it.

The drivers, who will spend all 72 hours on the road during the good weather, insist this is when the car becomes ‘fantastic value for money’.

Julian Cook, a Porsche Boxster owner, said: “It only cost me £22,000 second-hand last year and it’s now worth £8,000 so that’s been about £200 an hour in unforgettable behind-the-wheel experience.

“And much of that time was spent in a Cornish traffic jam trying to get to a pub that does really great fish and chips that stopped serving lunch the very second I arrived.

“You can’t put a price on memories like that. Even though I just did. But that doesn’t mean I’m counting.

“I am very happy with my car.”

Martin Bishop, who owns a brand new soft top Fiat 500, said: “People often say to me, ‘Martin, what were you thinking, you complete and utter fanny?’.

“But those are people who think of money purely in terms of something that you use to pay for things.

“A pound coin is really a dream token.”

Sign up now to get
The Daily Mash
free Headlines email – every weekday
privacy

Birmingham named UK’s most laughable city

BIRMINGHAM has taken the title of Britain’s most amusing city for the 10th year running.

Challenges from Derby and Cardiff were seen off easily by the West Midlands laughing stock, with Stoke-on-Trent losing out because judges found it was not funny if you actually live there.

Awards chairman Tom Logan said: “The combination of the accent, the architecture, Aston Villa and just that general air of sheer lolloping haplessness that shrouds the city means that Birmingham is unbeatable at the moment.

“Just try telling people it’s got more miles of canal than Venice and watch them crease up.”

Logan was keen to stress that the award should not be misconstrued as a suggestion that the inhabitants of Birmingham are gifted comedians.

He said: “Nothing makes a city less funny than everyone thinking they’re hilarious. My God, look at Liverpool.

“No, this is very much not laughing with Birmingham but laughing at Birmingham.”