Politics
IT looks like Labour are a shoo-in for the next election, doesn’t it? Well, here’s how we will massively f**k it up.
AN impatient Liz Truss has, for the fourth morning running, woken before dawn and rushed down to see if record growth has arrived yet.
THE pound is only worth less if you have the misfortune to be born a foreigner, the chancellor has assured Britain.
A MAN who paid seventeen f**king grand in stamp duty last year is never voting Tory again, he has confirmed.
THE UK’s rich have welcomed a budget that puts them and their needs first for a f**king change.
PRESIDENT Putin has asserted that he, and his poor beleaguered invading army, remain very much the victims in Ukraine.
NOW is not the time for party politics. Which is why we are only passing legislation close to the Queen’s heart, such as drilling for shale oil and unlimited bankers’ bonuses.
LIZ Truss has reassured the nation that she is certainly not using the blank cheque of a scrutiny-free opening period as prime minister to do anything bad.
A FINANCIALLY secure Guardian reader has admitted hoping Liz Truss would not do anything about energy bills so as to hasten the revolution.
DO you keep encountering people on radio phone-ins or in real life who ignored the obvious risks of Brexit? Here are six dense f**kers to make you despair for humanity.