Society

KEIR Starmer is stoking class war by threatening to make private schools pay VAT, the ungrateful peasant. Here is a short list of what those with Latin A-level have done for us.

THE intrigue of whether Josh from Hebden Bridge studies geography or natural sciences has its limits. Hit your fellow freshers with the real questions.

THE current condemnation of the 'noughties' will be nothing compared to the kicking the 2010s are in for when their time comes. Here’s why:

A STAGGERING 1,000 Met officers are currently suspended for alleged wrongdoing. And somehow it’s worse when you compare them with the respected coppers you grew up with, be they real or fictional.

THE third little pig has been left homeless after his house, built with RAAC concrete instead of bricks, was destroyed in a single blow.

A COUPLE are demanding money and presents just because they got laid, it has emerged.

A TEENAGER whose nostalgia for the 1990s has led to her listening to Pearl Jam and stealing her dad’s plaid shirt feels it is irrelevant that she was not even alive at the time.

A GROUP called Restore Trust is trying to stop the National Trust presenting a negative, ie. true, view of Britain’s past. Here’s how they would interpret history.

A WOMAN who has not cracked a smile at any point during a text exchange has nonetheless claimed that she is ‘laughing out loud’.

BRITAIN is solemnly remembering September 8th last year, the date when all television programming abruptly and without warning stopped.