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Does your vulva need a facelift? asks the Mash sex columnist

GOING to Turkey? Boobs, bum or labiaplasty? With vaginal anxiety apparently at an all-time high, women are turning to cosmetic surgery for the smile few will ever see.

Your astrological week ahead for July 6th, with Psychic Bob

Ramp up the sexiness in your household by being constantly blindfolded. Don’t just save it for the bedroom.

A white home counties roadman participates in a school democratic process, innit

WAGWAN? Man seriously vexed coz your fam, Active J, woz supposed to be voted as da class president. Calm.

Fat pointlessly lost from non-belly area

A MAN has wasted time and effort burning fat in areas of his body that are not his gut, it has frustratingly emerged.

This week in Mash History: Emmeline Pankhurst vows women will be able to vote for the man who shouts the loudest, 1913

MODERN Britain is a beacon of democracy, where anyone, no matter their background, can freely slag off whichever posho gets to be in charge.

Your astrological week ahead for June 29th, with Psychic Bob

What’s the point of doing drugs at the world’s greatest music festival? Do them somewhere shit, like Aldi.

The Archbishop of Canterbury on... Kemi Badenoch's unwise popularity contest with David Tennant

WAKING from a blissful dream in which I am floating on my back in the Dead Sea, only to find I am sloshing about in a large pool of vomit atop my mattress, I take stock of the events which led me to libation.

Why I'm running to be MP for Barnsley North. By Justin Timberlake

AWARD-winning pop sensation Justin Timberlake has been wowing crowds for decades. Here he explains why his next project is to represent the constituents of Barnsley North.

A confused Millennial tries to… continue to enjoy Harry Potter

Like every child who counts, I grew up loving Harry Potter. It got our generation into reading and spending hundreds of pounds at a walk-through studio tour in Leavesden.