Christmas

FEARLESS investigative right-wing journalists have once again managed to stop a conspiracy to cancel Christmas.

CHRISTMAS isn’t Christmas without a trip to a Winter Wonderland held on a patch of waste ground behind the local B&Q.

A SANTA hat teamed with hi-viz on a worker down the council recycling centre unaccountably fails to lift the spirit. Nor does it on these occasions.

THE public has been reminded there are only 14 of the most hellish days left until the most stressful time of the year.

PUBS are full of twats at the best of times. But at Christmas they’re filled with a special range of festive idiots, including these.

A WOMAN is standing inside looking out at the pissing rain that traditionally envelops Britain in December and feeling a Yuletide glow of warmth.

CHRISTMAS is a time to remember those less middle-class than ourselves. Here Charlotte Phelps suggests some who will rightly be eternally grateful for your one-off generosity.

BY next weekend, every spare moment will be consumed by festive duties. Here’s how to enjoy your last bit of free time unbesmirched by Christmas.

A FULLY-GROWN man has asked his sister if he can borrow all the component parts of a Christmas present, it has emerged.

THERE’S a sickeningly large selection of Christmas cards for people like partners, parents and siblings. But Clinton Cards is missing a huge and lucrative trick by ignoring these groups...