Business

THE lack of any ‘Brexit effect’ in employment, the stock market and the wider UK economy proves that Brexit is yet to take place, say experts.

A NEW type of yoghurt is being marketed on its lack of creaminess.

SAINSBURY’S has confirmed it had no idea that changing its meal deal ever-so-slightly would create a shitload of free publicity on social media.

THE seasonal aisle in a supermarket is reflecting on the passing of summer into autumn and the inexorable march of time.

THE EU has ruled that Apple is not a kindly old crofter living in an isolated cottage in County Mayo, as it had claimed for tax purposes. 

A MAN has returned to the office furious at how much work was left undone by his lazy bastard self from a fortnight ago.

MOTHERS do not mind earning a third less because having children is so wonderful, a report has found.

A CHAIN of pubs called The Brexiteer has opened for people who are jubilant about leaving the EU.

OLYMPICS-RELATED office 'fun' only serves to highlight the shitness of work, it has emerged.

THE UK’s borrowers and mortgage-holders have been reassured that yesterday’s interest rate cut will not affect their monthly repayments.