Food

A MOTHER is urging her adult daughter, home for Christmas, to fully consume all proffered food while also, long-term, slimming down.

CONFECTIONER Cadbury’s can no longer display a Royal Warrant after an incident between the King and a Creme Egg which he is still not entirely over.

The UK has once again been shaken to its foundations by the discovery that just because a mince pie is expensive does not mean it is the nicest tasting.

THEY used to be everywhere. It’s all your sister’s asked you to get in return for her laying on the whole Christmas day. But have you left it too late for a cheap tub of Heroes?

MORE than £25,000 worth of pies have, to the amazement of no-one, been stolen in a Yorkshire pie heist.

VEGANS are being sold ordinary nut assortments with numbers written on as specialist vegan advent calendars, it has emerged.

WHILE Gen Z favours ‘woke’ sandwich fillings like avocado and foreign cheese, here at Pret a Gammon our sandwiches are all resolutely traditional. Try one of these.

THE UK’s obese are to launch a groundbreaking legal case against their own sofas, they have confirmed.