International

How to hide that you're secretly madly in love with Vladimir Putin: a guide for right-wingers

FAR-RIGHT? Doing well with the patriots? They must never find out about your crush on the Prince Adam of the East, President Putin? Throw them off the scent.

Which European politician is the new Hitler?

FAR-RIGHT lunatics are seizing power across Europe, but which of these boggle-eyed xenophobes is fit to fill Adolf Hitler’s jackboots?

Why France doesn't count as a foreign holiday, by a 14-year-old whose parents dragged her there last week

HAVING just returned from France, which is shit, Grace Wood-Morris can state definitively that it does not count as a proper holiday abroad.

World takes day off to have a good laugh

THE entire planet has sacked today off to have a laugh at Donald Trump’s expense, it has emerged.

Man waiting for correct opinion on Iran helicopter crash to emerge so he can have it

A MAN is withholding any views thoughts on the death of Iran’s president in a helicopter crash until the acceptable opinion comes to light and he can claim it as his own.

Assassination while Europe teeters on brink of war 'thrillingly retro', says world

THE world is feeling a warm glow of nostalgia thanks to the uncanny historical similarities that can be read into the shooting of the Slovakian prime minister.