Lifestyle

ARE you an obnoxious middle class prick keen to be superior to your friends? Then take these to their picnic.

A BEE hotel hanging from a tree at the bottom of a garden has received a brutal review on Tripadvisor, it has emerged.

AFTER using a train bathroom, a male passenger is bitterly lamenting his decision not to sit down to piss.

PRESIDENT Erdoğan of Turkey is such a masculine boss man that he made Putin wait 50 seconds before shaking his hand. What other tiny-penised power moves could he have used?

ADVICE to stay at home in the heatwave has been ignored by insufferable twats migrating in search of air-con. Here’s where you’ll find them.

NOBODY understands how hard it is to maintain standards when you’re middle-class in an awful vulgar heatwave. Francesca Johnson explains her relatable issues:.

SUMMER is here, shoes are unwearably hot and you’re searching for other options. Treat your repugnant feet to these.

A WOMAN complimented on her £300 sundress has modestly pretended it is no more than a soiled rag she unearthed from the bottom of a bin.

YOUR holiday is booked, but your flabby mass is nowhere near beach body ready. Here are your worst features and how to disguise them.

MANAGED to escape your kids for two minutes? Congratulations. Here is how you will squander your precious free time.