Science & Technology

THERE are people who enjoy wine as something other than a means of getting wasted, it has been claimed.

THE best way to fend off a shark attack is from within the shark, it has been claimed.

SO-CALLED ‘life hacks’ are really just pointless tips for dull misers, it has emerged.

BRITONS are struggling to comprehend how it can be sunny but freezing f**king cold. 

A MAN is absolutely outraged at the pathetic size and technological backwardness of his friend’s television.

ANGRY people who scrawl offensive filth on the walls of public toilets can now make their messages twice as long.

THE iPhone X shatters on contact with any solid object because it is too good for our material plane, Apple has explained.

A MOTHER has announced the discovery of age-related imperfections on her 33-year-old daughter’s face.

A MAN has been woken in the middle of the night by a friend’s urgent text about maybe having a pint.

A NORTH Face coat designed for the most extreme weather conditions on Earth has resigned itself to being used as a fancy duvet on the high street.