Society

THE hat worn by Princess Beatrice at the Royal Wedding has been offered its own chat show.

MIDDLE class people have asserted their right to feel smug about not having a television despite watching exactly the same shit on computers.

TERRIFYING numbers of people are going nuts on the streets of England because two people they've never met are getting married in a big church.

ACROSS the country, British people are readying themselves for a once-in-a-lifetime fridge-cleaning moment.

MILLIONS of Playstation users are in turmoil after it emerged that the console had stolen huge chunks of their existences.

SAS recruitment problems may leave Britain's idiots with nothing to read on holiday, experts have warned.

THE UK's employees aren't going to be doing a lot this week, they have announced.

ALMOST one thousand Anglicans are to mark Easter by making a slight adaptation to their voodoo.

A CAMERAMAN faces legal action after failing to make a wedding look better than it actually was.

LONELY individuals seeking love online are being exploited by people who pretend to have funny little ways about them, it has emerged.