Sport

LORRIES have been shifting Manchester’s reserves of insufferable smugness following yesterday's derby game.

THE first four matches of the 2015/16 Premier League season have been illegally uploaded to the internet.

THE University of Bedfordshire has sent a team to compete against Oxford and Cambridge in tomorrow’s 161st boat race.

ONCE-A-YEAR gamblers have yet to hear anything about last year’s Grand National flutter and believe it may still be on the final furlong.

MANCHESTER City manager Manuel Pellegrini is safe in his job until at least 12.53pm today, the club's owners have confirmed.

HARRY Kane's England career is over after he burnt out just 80 seconds into last night's match.

THE Lithuania side are looking forward to going in studs-first on England’s big names in tonight’s Euro qualifier.

FISHING is not a sport but an attempt to eradicate fish from the world, fishermen have confirmed.

THE final of the World Cup in Qatar has been disastrously scheduled on the same day as the cut-off date for Amazon orders.

AFTER yet another failed attempt to reach the quarter-finals of the Champions League, British clubs have concluded they do not exist.