Lifestyle

BEING a straight man is all about having big muscles and an obsession with your penis. Anything else makes you look really gay, explains totally-not-gay man Tom Booker.

THE British public believes advice to limit the size of Christmas gatherings means you should have loads of people from different households over. 

A MAN who got up slightly earlier than most people wrongly believes everyone is interested in this fact.

THE sleep-deprived parents of a newborn baby have enlarged a photo of her onto a three-foot canvas where she looks like a mutant freak.

A FAMILY are worried about the man of the house after he shed tears at a non-sporting event for the first time in their whole lives.

IS everyday life full of baffling questions you’re losing sleep over? Here are some mysteries that confuse the nation every single day.

HOW you start the day has a huge impact on your life, and I’m here to tell you, in barely credible terms, how to begin yours in the best, most bullshit way.

WE live alongside a whole host of everyday objects too repellent to ever allow ourselves to dwell on. These filthy six are in your home...

AS winter sets in, there are always one or two men around wearing shorts. I am one of them and I'm here to tell you why, in an effort to stop you presuming I'm just a bellend.

THE UK is only days into a second lockdown and has already reached the point where it is just walking around wearing a f**king duvet.