Lifestyle

Jubilation as ex-banker’s artisan tearoom in Cotswolds goes tits up

THERE was unconfined joy as an ex-banker relocated from London to the countryside only to see his venture fail within six months.

Instagram's Rich Kids of Cornwall proudly display their fish, nuts and berries

INSTAGRAM'S 'Rich Kids of Cornwall' have been showing off their nuts, fish and berries on the social network.

Man tells usual Friday lie about not spending entire weekend playing videogames

A 28-YEAR-OLD has once again pretended he has genuine plans for the weekend.

Britain marks Epiphany with weekend of Christmas dregs

BRITAIN is celebrating the day Christ was revealed as God incarnate by consuming a bottle of Bailey’s, some manky chocolates and a recording of Judi Dench: A Passion for Trees.

Men still struggling to describe how they want their hair cut

MEN have admitted that no matter how many haircuts they have had, they still fall into a state of mumbling idiotic confusion when asked how they want it done.

Mum praises kids for decorating tree while thinking 'what a f**king mess'

A WOMAN is inwardly seething over the colossal disaster her children have made of decorating the Christmas tree.

Couple who always buy real Christmas tree still pretending it's a good idea

A COUPLE who buy a real tree every Christmas are still insisting it is not a ridiculous pain in the arse.

Couple pathetically claim to be 'into hotels'

A COUPLE have made the sickening claim that their hobby is staying in boutique hotels.

Why is it so hard to buy a flat in a cool area of this incredibly expensive city?

ALL I want are the same things my parents wanted - a good job, a partner and a two-bedroom live/work space in a nice area of the world’s third-richest city.

Man who claims ‘I’m a bit of a night owl,’ actually just a lazy twat

A LAZY bastard who stays in bed until 12pm has claimed it is because he is a ‘night owl’.