Lifestyle

AN 18-year-old boy is celebrating being the only twat in his year spoilt enough to be given a brand new car for his birthday.

IN a bathroom? Not sure if it belongs to a single man? Take this quiz and find out.

REALISED you're drinking in a rough pub? Cross your fingers that none of these unfortunate events happen.

YOUR retired parents have announced they are not keeping their savings for you to inherit but are blowing the lot on a campervan.

SO you’ve arrived at the station only to discover you’re travelling on a two-carriage rattler. Read these tips to make it through a journey that’s inevitably going to be awful.

WORKERS are back in the office, and middle-class workers who spunked thousands on home offices look like dicks. Here’s some twattish things to do with them.

LIKE Eskimos having a hundred words for snow, adult men have a huge number of names for the thing hanging between their legs. Here are the worst.

ABSOLUTELY f**king knackered? That's because you stayed up until the early hours indulging in these pointless activities instead of sleeping.

HAVE you got a car you only use to nip into town with a dashboard that looks like it’s been designed by NASA? Here’s why modern cars are shit.

YOUR greatest achievements occurred during childhood. But strangely none of them are highly valued in adult life. Weep as you remember the pointless effort you put into these…