Science & Technology
Being left alone for five f*cking minutes now impossible
ANNOYING bastards are going to be constantly pestering you, thanks to electronic things.
Free pint if you can eat a portion of the Earth's core
BRITISH scientists are offering a free pint of lager to anyone who can eat a plateful of the Earth's core.
Brains of UKIP members 'hacked'
BRAINS belonging to members of UKIP have been hacked causing them to go mental.
Humanity to be destroyed by boredom
HUMANITY will be destroyed by its need to keep dicking about with things for no reason, academics have warned.
Higgs carrying particle around in matchbox
PHYSICIST Peter Higgs is treating the 'God particle' like a tiny pet, it has been claimed.
Every 100th cigarette amazing
ONE in a hundred fags has a special ingredient that makes it incredible.
Dream-reading brain scans 'a very bad idea'
BRAIN scans that can read your dreams need to be stopped immediately, it has been agreed.
Nokia with broken screen is best phone of all time
AFTER 40 years of mobile telephones, a Nokia with a broken screen has been declared the greatest.
