Society

The cliched Christmas of bitter hardship old people never actually had

OLD folk love to remind everyone of the grim Christmases of their childhood which they stoically endured without complaining. But could these memories be lies?

Man who long outgrew Santa still believes in Jesus

A MAN who left Santa behind decades ago still believes in the magic baby part of Christmas, he has confirmed.

The Daily Mash Quiz of 2022, the year the Tories f**ked it

Win a year's free Mash Premium by answering questions about 2022! You don't even have to get them right! You can be as thick as anything!

Five ways to make the least of Twixmas

SPEND quality time with loved ones? Achieve goals that would make you proud? Or piss away the promise of these five days pointlessly? Here’s how.

Santa does traditional shit in naughty family's fireplace

FATHER Christmas has visited the naughty family on the estate to let them know of his displeasure by leaving a massive turd.

Fresher's entirely new personality not a hit at home

A FRESHER’S entirely new personality, developed and nurtured during his first term at university, is proving surprisingly unpopular with his hometown friends.

Driver doing 20 in a 30 briefly becomes most hated man on planet

A MAN driving at 20mph in a 30mph zone briefly joined the ranks of tyrants and mass killers as the most loathed person on earth.

A new boiler, and other aggravating ways to blow money you could have had fun with

SPEND weeks agonising over £60 shoes then have to drop a grand on boiler repairs without blinking? These are the dull as f**k purchases that eat cash.

Five ideal gifts for scowling, ungrateful teenagers

SHOPPING for your miserable adolescent who last removed their headphones in March? These five presents won’t even make a dent in their resentment.

Haggis for breakfast and presents up a 40ft pine tree: Christmas traditions from around the UK

DID you know the Welsh greet Christmas morning by opening their windows to invite the drizzle in? These bizarre Yuletide traditions come from around the UK.