Politics

THE public has confirmed it is content to watch an impaled Boris Johnson wriggle like a worm on a hook for a while before being finished off.

MY MPs tried to kick me out. The country booed me at the Jubilee. But I’m here with one thing to say to the turncoats: suck my big posh dick.

BORIS Johnson has lamented that a single error, committed multiple times over a year, seems set to blight his long and distinguished career of public service.

TODAY’S vote of no confidence called by the biased media was won with the prime minister receiving 100 per cent of the vote before it even took place. Here’s how.

THE UK has had a lovely four days off celebrating the Jubilee before returning to work for a pleasant day of getting rid of Boris Johnson.

ARE you a Tory MP trying to work out whether Boris Johnson is f**ked enough for you to hand in a letter of no confidence? Here’s how to decide.

GOOD morning. When I am elected prime minister, it is my pledge to you that I will commit the following crimes:

GRATEFUL Britons are relieved that the cost of living crisis is now over thanks to Rishi Sunak’s incredibly generous one-off payment of £400.

DESPITE apparently not existing, the magic money tree is set to cut UK energy bills by hundreds of pounds, it has emerged.

THE exact same people facilitating Boris Johnson’s escape from any kind of consequence are marvelling that he has escaped without consequences.