Arts & Entertainment

DOCTOR Who is a totally unrealistic and quite annoying role model for children, parents have realised.

DEAR Boris, I too am a bulbous pink figure with a toothy grin who went from media darling to widely despised irritant.

AN ENGLAND fan has been jailed for writing a song called Ball of Victory.

THE 13-year-old who created ITV2’s Love Island has been grounded indefinitely by his parents.

A FILM studies graduate cannot believe cinemagoers simply enjoyed a film that was  entertaining and fun without being an intellectual twat about it.

A WOMAN is disgusted her boyfriend would behave like the men on Love Island, which he would because he is a representative of his gender.

READING a book in a cafe, on the Tube or at the wheel of your car makes you look wise and mysterious, even if you’re just posing and not taking in a word.  

BEYONCE and Jay-Z have released a joint album about that time she left the bath running and it overflowed through the kitchen ceiling. 

A MAN has stood at the very front of a concert shouting for the band’s biggest song even though they're fucking obviously going to play it at some point anyway.

A TEENAGER who thought he was just going around to see his friend has ended up trapped in a dad band jam session that may never end.