Arts & Entertainment

MILTON Keynes has been advised its European Capital of Culture bid would be unsuccessful even if Britain stayed in the EU and paid £350m a day.

FORMER Smiths frontman Morrissey has released a charity single raising funds for utter bastards.

A FATHER-OF-TWO has performed the entire solo from Guns N’ Roses’ November Rain while driving his children to school, they have confirmed.

THE makers of Imodium have released a heartwarming Christmas advert featuring a monster with chronic diarrhoea.

A PROMOTIONAL festive lorry full of Special Brew and Brew-related gifts is touring the UK.

AN OBSESSIVE Call of Duty player claims the real war is fending off the women who want to snatch him from his gaming chair.

A PLAY has been ruined after the cast repeatedly broke into song, it has emerged.

A MAN is feeling proud of himself after removing House of Cards from his Netflix ‘to watch’ list.

BAKE-OFF judge Prue Leith has accidentally tweeted conclusive proof that God is dead and you are going to burn in Hell forever.

A WOMAN drawn into conversation about Stranger Things has fooled everyone into believing she has seen it by making a series of vague 1980s references.