Arts & Entertainment

A COUPLE with two children under eight have been watching The Revenant every night for the last two weeks because the kids will not stay the f**k in bed.

LOVE a romantic comedy? Ever noticed that in half of them the path of true love runs mad? These five classics will have you saying ‘aw’, ‘haha’ and ‘er, what the f**k?’

MUSICAL tastes are varied and subjective, but every parent has bought and listened to the same shitty albums. Here are the awful CDs cluttering up their racks.

BACK then everyone left the door unlocked, children played outside and TV adverts were frothingly insane. All of these would be certified 18 today.

WHEN you were young you thought music was about universal stuff like love, getting dumped or cars, not whatever the musician was high on. These songs make it obvious.

EVERY dad knows the coolest bands ever were the ones you were listening to in your drink and drug-addled 20s. Here are the bands your kids will think just make you a bit of a twat.

WOAH, what just happened? No, seriously what happened, because there's dramatic music but you have no clue. These twists sent you straight to your phone to find out.

THERE’S films for girls and weaklings, then there are films for alphas. If you’ve not watched all of these then you’re not one.

COMPARED to the thrilling gadgets available to children these days, the things that passed for entertainment in the 90s were tragic.  

CHILDREN across the UK are being encouraged to celebrate One Britain One Nation day by singing a creepy patriotic dirge. What would be a more appropriate choice?