Money graph go down means bad: a simple guide to the latest financial f**k up

CONFUSED by the latest intervention by the Bank of England? Learn everything you need to know with this simple guide.

Banker getting massive uncapped bonus for f**king up pound

A CITY banker will receive a huge uncapped bonus for his hard work shorting the pound yesterday, all thanks to Kwasi Kwarteng.

Nail bars at war with vape shops for total high street domination

NAIL bars and vape shops are locked in a ruthless head-to-head war to win complete domination of every high street in Britain, it has emerged.

Wetherspoons at risk of surviving rise in energy bills

WETHERSPOONS pubs are at risk of being the only survivors of a 300 per cent rise in energy bills, experts have warned.

Why I should be running vital public services, by a pirate

YO ho ho! Captain Clegg here, feared freebooter of the seas whose only loyalty is to gold, explaining why it’s crucial to put vital public services in my hands.

'Price cap' means f**k all, energy companies admit

ENERGY companies have admitted that the words ‘price’ and ‘cap’ are just meaningless sounds they like to say every now and then.

How privatised energy companies make money vs. a proper business

WONDERING why the country has privatised energy companies when they are so terrible? Here is how they compare with a real business that does not screw over its customers.

We are taking all of your things, by BP

YOUR holiday? We’re having that. Your new kitchen? That’s ours now. Your second car? Give it the f**k here. We are BP, and we’ve having all your shit.

Why poundshops were always bollocks

THE poundshop may soon be a thing of the past, as few items still cost £1. Britons are predictably upset, but the truth is they were always bollocks. Here’s why.

Six ways to get through three weeks of Jubilee wank

HORSES are parading, M&S biscuits are rebranded, and Nicholas Witchell is clearing his throat. Jubilee hysteria is upon us. Here’s how to make it through.