Business

OIL companies would never dream of doing bad things, Britain's most powerful ginger claimed last night.

PEOPLE who own private jets will face higher taxes in a bid to make the system fairer for people who just rent them.

WORLD'S worst banker Fred Goodwin hosts money orgies where he has intercourse with a series of life-size papier maché figures made from £20 notes.

THE £6.5m bonus paid to Barclays chief Bob Diamond was last night criticised by people with no real grasp of capitalism.

ONE of the greatest Guardian reader conspiracy theories of the last 20 years was under threat last night after Rupert Murdoch agreed to sell Sky News.

THE new Semi-Super Saver Single Return Railroader Autumn Summer Traveller Student Nurse District Pet Family Oxbow Lake Pass is actually straightforward, according to train bosses.

ONE in every seven company directors in Britain should be a Brazilian transvestite with a pronounced facial tick, according to a new report.

THE nauseating bullshit British Gas uses to justify its vicious profiteering leapt 24 per cent last year.

BP has asked Prince William and Kate Middleton if there is any chance they could invite Colonel Gaddafi to their wedding in April.

MICROSOFT was today applying some rouge and lipstick to the dead face of Nokia.