Business

THE News International cat was at least 2,000 miles from its bag, it was estimated last night.

ESTATE agents are struggling to find buyers for Britain's increasing number of on-fire homes, it has emerged.

FOUR year-old Gemma Logan has been unveiled as the new chief executive of the Royal Bank of Scotland.

BAD money thing make world have big new scary time, clever men say now.

SCARY dragon Duncan Bannatyne last night said he was 'in' for 30 per cent of a funky device that breaks people's arms.

BONUSES at Barclays will rise despite a fall in profits because that is just how the whole thing actually works, the bank has explained.

THE violent death of every human being was prevented last night after some American politicians agreed to get some more money.

BSKYB is to change its corporate logo to a manicured hand flipping off the whole world.

BOUTIQUE computer giant Apple will no longer be selling its machines to the ugly, it has been confirmed.

COSMETICS giant L'Oreal has admitted its disappointment at not being allowed to commit fraud.