Health

YOUNG Britons are switching to elephant-based drugs after the horse tranquiliser Ketamine was officially designated as so last week.

WOMEN who think their relationships should mirror those in romantic comedies are pathetic, experts revealed last night.

OFFICE workers can halt the spread of the winter vomiting virus by not vomiting on each other, doctors said last night.

PRIME minister Gordon Brown was last night under observation in a London psychiatric hospital after claiming to be Spiderman.

ELDERLY people in hospital will be referred to by a number under new NHS guidelines.

NEW evidence suggests it is safe for a baby to be born drunk, doctors said last night.

PATIENTS who are given artificial hearts will lose their soul, doctors admitted last night.

NEW doctors are to be trained how to spot death, the department of health announced yesterday.

ANGRY parents are demanding compensation after an obesity gene made them feed their children until they popped.

SMOKERS have urged Bill Gates to produce a range of software that doesn't have them reaching for a cigarette every time it crashes.