Six bollocks herbal remedies that aren't as effective as a lie down and a Stella

WHEN doctors prescribe fluids and rest, they mean consuming lager in a horizontal position. Not this nonsense hippies try to convince you will do a better job.

Outrage as NHS staff asked to believe in medicine

OUTRAGED NHS staff are threatening to quit after being asked to believe in the efficacy of medicine to prevent disease and illness.

Hair will naturally clean itself, says woman who stinks

A WOMAN who believes her hair will clean itself naturally is unaware that it smells disgusting.

Are you paranoid? This is what everyone's saying about you

PARANOID that everyone’s talking about you behind your back? No need to worry, they’re only whispering this...

Five Covid rules you haven't stuck to since Freedom Day

INFECTION numbers are through the roof again, because nobody’s done any of these since Monday July 19th.

Exhausted woman barely has energy to tell you how exhausted she is

A WOMAN claiming to be tired is almost too tired to tell you how tired she is.

Anti-vaxxers move on to Lemsip

VACCINE sceptics are now condemning Lemsip, the popular lemon-flavoured cold and flu remedy, as government mind control.

It's just a cold, says colleague coughing all over the office

A MAN says his colleagues do not need to worry about him coughing and sneezing in their faces, because it is just a cold and not Covid.

PE teacher fully aware it's not real teaching

A PE teacher has confirmed he is fully cognisant of the fact that being paid to make kids run around a field is a piss-easy gig.

Woman who has never sat up straight in her life wondering why her back hurts

A WOMAN who has the posture of a prawn cannot find a reason for her mysteriously persistent back pain.