Lifestyle

NEED to make everyone around you lose the will to live? Infuriating toddler James Bates explains how to push people over the edge.

THERE’S no point being middle class unless you’re able to out-do everyone else. Keep ahead of the Joneses with these entitled evening classes.

PEOPLE change, and one day you wake up, look in the mirror and realise you’ve become exactly what you despise. Here are the key signs.

AUTUMN, the season of mists and limited edition coffees is here, but which matches your twat level at this time of year?

FOOTBALLERS enjoy a balloonful. Youths at lockdown raves go mad for it. But what is ‘hippy crack’ and could it become the drug à la mode for relaxed kitchen suppers? Lord Denys Finch Hatton investigates.

A DOG has been left humiliated after his owner forced him to wear a novelty jumper on a walk around the park.

THIS year has been shit enough without attempting to sort out all the huge, festering problems in your life. So treat keep sweeping all of these things under the carpet until 2020 is over.

A MAN has been to his barber for his fourth haircut of 2020 like the high-maintenance bastard he is, it has emerged.

DO you think you’re impressing people by quoting wise sayings? Check they’re not the following overused phrases and you actually sound like a twat.

NOBODY has more than six friends, and if you do most of them are filler. Here’s how to sift the worthwhile friends from the dregs dragging you down.