Lifestyle

Five things that will shatter your hopes of a lie-in

EXHAUSTED and looking forward to an extra hour in bed? Here’s five reasons why it won’t happen this or any other weekend.

'100 per cent' and other annoying ways to tell someone you agree with them

WHY agree by saying 'yes' when you could annoy the crap out of someone by saying '100 percent'? Try these irritating affirmatives.

Middle-class family resentfully install pizza oven they're now required to have

A MIDDLE-CLASS family are fuming about the top-of-the-range pizza oven, complete with brick surround, that they are currently having built in their garden.

Woman shaves six milliseconds off time between putting on heels and regretting it

A WOMAN has scored a new personal best in her time between putting on heels for the day and deeply regretting it.

A lady never tells her age, says 25-year-old

A WOMAN who is only 25 bizarrely thinks it is her prerogative as a female to keep her age a closely guarded secret.

The five most terrifying things that happen in the first year of having a baby

HAVING a child is a life-changing experience. A mostly terrifying one. Here are five of the worst bits from year one, although there could be 50.

Five essential summer care tips for your goth

A HOT summer can be a testing time for goths. Follow our advice to ensure yours stays safe, but gloomy.

Are you being gentrified? Take our quiz

WORRIED that you might be a victim of the gentrification usually reserved for areas of cities? Find out if you’ll soon be priced out of your own life:

Bikini-clad woman at beach refuses to frolic

A WOMAN wearing a bikini to the beach on a scorching summer day has outraged observers with her flat refusal to frolic.

Child-free couple announce they're expecting another hobby

A COUPLE without children have contacted friends and family to let them know they are expecting the arrival of a new hobby.