Society

Man from Leeds doesn't know everyone from Leeds

A MAN from Leeds has been forced to explain he does not know every one of the city’s 766,000 residents personally.

Woman enters third week of battling Starbucks latte

A WOMAN is beginning to make headway on the enormous frothy cup in front of her.

UK exhausted from arguing with Brexit f**kwits

MILLIONS of Britons are physically exhausted after spending what feels like decades arguing with people who do not understand anything.

Another triumph for democracy, sighs Britain

THE appointment of a new prime minister 14 months after it barely elected a different one has Britain once again marvelling at democracy.

Man who thinks EU is corrupt thinks everything is corrupt

A MAN who voted to leave the EU because it is corrupt believes an unfeasibly large number of people and institutions are dishonest.

Woman thinks Adidas is a designer label

A WOMAN believes popular brands of sportswear such as Adidas and Nike are designer clothing.

London-bound man excited about spending £4 on a cup of tea

A MAN moving to London cannot wait to drop the best part of a fiver on a cup of tea.

I had affair with your sister and got her pregnant 'in good faith', man tells wife

A MAN has explained to his wife that fathering a child with his sister-in-law 'was the right decision at the time'.

Brexiter’s excuses increasingly bollocks

A MAN’S excuses for problems clearly caused by Brexit are getting increasingly desperate.

Man’s comments about 'baby boomers' starting to sound kind of bigoted

A MAN who blames ‘baby boomers’ for everything is starting to sound like a racist, people have noticed.