Society

THE child of a smoker is thrilled with his sturdy new walking boots and 'military-style' compass.

A NORTHERN man has left a trail of terror across London by attempting to interact socially with everyone he meets.

FREE plastic bags have issued a message of solidarity and respect before going home to deep space. 

SO-CALLED ‘road rage’ may simply be the result of being a bad-tempered bastard in any given situation.

ANGRY protesters have laid siege to a 'cereal cafe' in East London because it is quite annoying.

A SUDDEN heavy downpour left a man with no choice but to eat raw fish for lunch.

A MOTHER has set a new British record for totally losing her shit on the morning school run.

A COUPLE is to become the first in Britain to divorce because of Jeremy Corbyn.

A COUPLE are puzzled by how their unhinged, paranoid behaviour has failed to save their troubled relationship.

A WOMAN has based her all her thinking on philosophical quotes written on chalk boards outside local businesses.