An Excellent Day All Round, Say Media, Police And Anarchists

A GATHERING in central London was enjoyed greatly by all who took part, the organisers have confirmed.

What's A Physics? Ask GCSE Pupils

CONCERNS have been raised over the standard of science teaching after it emerged thousands of GCSE pupils could not tell the difference between a microscope and a frog.

Archbishop Of Canterbury Talks Himself Out Of A Job

THE Archbishop of Canterbury talked himself out of a job last night.

Is Ofcom Run By Poofters?

CONCERN was growing last night that Ofcom, the media watchdog, is being run by a bunch of nancy-boy poofters.

Inflation Basket To Include ‘grand Designs’

THE basket of goods used to calculate inflation will now include property show Grand Designs, the Office for National Statistics said last night.

Women Sad About Something, Say Men

WOMEN across Britain seem to be terribly sad about something, men said today.

Evil Purpose Of Google Street View Remains Unclear

GOOGLE launched its new Street View service yesterday amid fresh speculation about exactly how evil it really is.

‘My Son Pushed His Willy Between His Legs And Pretended To Be A Girl’

AUTHOR Julie Myerson last night stepped up her attack on estranged son Jake by revealing how he used to dance around naked with his penis between his thighs pretending to be Bonnie Langford.

Back To Basics At Crufts As Best In Show Goes To Deformed Rat

CRUFTS, the world's biggest dog show, last night shrugged off recent controversies and went back to basics by awarding the top prize to one of those weird little dogs that looks like a deformed rodent.

Why are all the pubs closing? ask people who never go to the pub

MILLIONS of people across Britain who never go to the pub have been asking why all the pubs were closing down.