Work

A COUPLE are preparing their toddler for adulthood by buying him a tiny grey cubicle to sit in all day, it has emerged.

THE UK has been told to get to work and shut the fuck up for the next four months until its next allotted happiness break at Christmas.

A MAN who everyone assumed was lying about his “passion for telemarketing” has a genuine love of the shitty, time-wasting career.

A LOCAL postman is furious with residents on his route for receiving mail.

A BOX of green tea in an office kitchen has now been there longer than any of the employees.

A RECRUITER has had a moment of remorse before going straight back to being a bastard, it has been revealed.

A WOMAN claiming to be a ‘perfectionist’ is notably poor at performing even the most basic tasks of her job.

GOING to the toilet at work is a minefield of unflushed bogs and sharing your intimate bodily functions with co-workers. Here’s how to get through it with dignity.

IF SOMEONE in the office is wearing headphones it means they want everyone to fuck off, it has been claimed.

A BOSS has arrived in the office wearing a light blue shirt, a blue waistcoat and no jacket, and is gathering everyone for a talk.