Politics

THE government has decided to fire 91,000 civil servants who it assumes are completely dispensable layabouts.

DOWNING Street has set up a TikTok account for the Prime Minister. So which pathetic trends will he be following in an attempt to be popular?

THE government could not be less interested in the cost-of-living crisis. But people keep asking about it, so MP Martin Bishop has some ideas.

IT’S entirely plausible that a dull, play-it-safe type like Keir Starmer would order a chicken korma. Curry aficionado Wayne Hayes explains what politicians’ choices say about them.

KEIR Stamer’s latest underhand move proves he is playing petty politics with police lives and hang on, I’m out of my f**king depth here.

NOTICE me. Please notice me. Have you noticed me yet? Do I have to take some kind of principled idiotic stand or something?

The first to present me with a gilt-edged Brexit opportunity will in turn be presented with this shiny sovereign. Now, to work!

A CONTRITE, tearful Keir Starmer has confessed that his first Beergate beer tasted so good he opened a second without thought for the consequences.

WE’VE lost control of a few councils. Labour haven’t triumphed but we’re struggling. F**k all that. What does it mean for Britain’s main character, me?

ACHIEVED questionable election results? Not sure how to express yourself? Labour voter Martin Bishop explains how to celebrate.