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Your astrological week ahead for July 26th, with Psychic Bob

“I’m representing you pro bono, so midway through the trial I may go off on a tangent about how f**king good Achtung Baby was.”

The Archbishop of Canterbury on… Hulk Hogan: legend, scab, reincarnation racist

WAKING up with a hangover so intense that the hangover itself has a hangover, I reflect on another tumultuous week in ecclesiastical affairs. 

A confused millennial tries to… understand the complex majesty of Labubu dolls

I’M NOT smooth-brained. I know that the marketplace of ideas regularly blesses consumers with overpriced crazes, and it’s our civic duty to buy into them.

Your astrological week ahead for July 19th, with Psychic Bob

Great so many people have been able to see Oasis this summer. They can cross that off their bucket hat list.

The Archbishop of Canterbury on… enjoying Wonderwall for the 10,000th time, Noel?

WAKING with a hangover the size of Hampshire, I clear my system by vomiting copiously from an upstairs window, which drenches a passerby but calms my stomach magnificently, and reflect upon the week’s events. 

Patties like beer mats and chips from f**king sweet potatoes: The gammon food critic's smash burger bar experience

NOBODY knows their burgers like us Brits. They're a homegrown national institution, like pizzas and curry. Except these days everyone feels the need to reinvent the f**king wheel.

Mash Blind Date: 'It's a lot harder using ChatGPT to charm her into bed in person'

SHYNESS, laziness and ChatGPT guided James Bates, aged 30, to a date with 33-year-old Jo Kramer. But will this modern-day Cyrano have the heart of a poet in person?

Your astrological week ahead for July 12th, with Psychic Bob

Ladies, why not spice up your love life by claiming you’ve been fingered by a ghost?

The Archbishop of Canterbury on… RIP Jimmy Swaggart, man of God but mostly prostitutes

WAKING with a hangover so toxic that when I vomit and my dog comes scampering into my room to eat it he drops dead on the spot, I reflect on the week’s events.

A white home counties roadman 'as been chosen to be a bossman ball boy at da Wimbledon tennis ting

WAGWAN? Did fam see Active J on da TV? Man woz hinspirational. Parentdem is batshit for da tennis, innit. So dem fixed it for yours truly to be a ball muggle at da Wimbledon ting!