Arts & Entertainment

A FESTIVAL to promote Brexit has been cancelled because it was an incredibly terrible idea on every level, the organisers have revealed.

THE Duchess of Sussex’s first financial venture will be a self-help book focused on co-existing with nightmare in-laws.

A MAN has confirmed that the book which changed his life forever is the user manual for his microwave oven.

YOUNG people have confirmed that Christmas telly is not a thing and they do not understand why their parents think it is.

ELF film and booze make everything  nice, thinks tired Britain.

ROBBIE Williams wants your nan to give him £15 for an album he took no pleasure in making and she will get no pleasure from listening to.

THE Glastonbury Festival has confirmed its 2020 headliners are Taylor Swift and Leader of the House of Commons, Jacob Rees-Mogg.

LABOUR are thought to be on the verge of victory after winning the much-coveted endorsement of Libertines frontman Pete Doherty.

WITH the 25th James Bond film on the way, certain awkward questions about the long-running franchise really need answering. Here they are.

WHEN you make an amusing pop culture reference does everyone just looks at you blankly? You could be very old.