Arts & Entertainment

WATCHING Eurovision to sneer at it is no better than watching it genuinely, like a Belgian, it has been confirmed.

BUYERS of adult colouring books have discovered they are devoid of any erotic content.

DIRECTOR George Miller has revealed that Mad Max: Fury Road was entirely ad-libbed by the cast.

A GARDEN with hedges and borders containing more than 16 tonnes of hand-shredded pornography has won a gold medal at Chelsea Flower Show.

THE UK has descended into chaos as strike action at Good Morning Britain stretches into a second day.

A MUSIC festival has invited punters to do whatever they like except bring in their own alcohol.

THE Football Manager games depict fictional events with no bearing on reality, it has been confirmed.

SPLIT-SECOND frames of hardcore gay pornography were spliced into BBC4’s All Aboard! The Canal Boat Trip.

EVERYONE on television and radio is just some fucker trying to get you all worked up.

THE reinvention of Matthew McConaughey's acting career has entered a period of philosophic upheaval and rational, scientific debate.