Celebrity

THE royal foetus plans to get a pair of mediocre A-levels, have a brief military career or set up an unsuccessful cake business, it has emerged.

IF Kate Middleton's baby has red hair there is going to be big trouble, the Queen has warned Prince Harry.

THE orangutan photographed by Kate Middleton is seeking damages, it has emerged.

PEACHES Geldof has revealed she is due to give birth to herself in less than two months.

BANK of England chief Mervyn King likes alternative rock and spiked wristbands, it has emerged.