The best desperate tactics when you're trying to hold in a piss

IS your bladder absolutely bursting with no solution in sight? Here are five ploys to help you fight the need to pee.

Nurses recall their hard-partying pandemic days

THE UK’s teachers and nurses are looking back at the early days of the pandemic lockdown when life for them was just one long party.

Lucky woman enjoys one whole week a month where her hormones aren't being a dick

A LUCKY woman is able to enjoy one week out of four without her uterus making her life shit, she has confirmed.

Five weird ways to increase belly fat

TIRED of not being able to fill out your extra-large jeans? Start piling on the pounds with these surprising tricks that actually work.

Milk of magnesia and other f**king hideous medicines you were forced to endure as a kid

BEING ill as a child was made even worse by the godawful things you were made to take for it. Here are six vile ‘remedies’ your mum swore by.

No amount of vitamin supplements can rescue your f**ked up diet and lifestyle

NECKING vitamin and mineral supplements will do bugger all to make up for your terrible lifestyle choices, doctors have confirmed.

Boots to include Covid tests in Meal Deal

HIGH street pharmacy Boots is to start including lateral flow tests as part of its lunchtime Meal Deal.

Covid goes out on a high

THE coronavirus has triumphantly ended its classic run in England by infecting the country’s head of state, it has confirmed.

Half-term giving parents lockdown flashbacks

THE half-term holiday is triggering the PTSD parents developed during last winter’s unbearable f**king lockdown, they have confirmed.

Are you punishing yourself enough this January?

WE’RE halfway through a month of gruelling self-improvement, from temperance to exercise to chugging oat milk. But are you hurting yourself enough?