Relationships

Your family members ranked from worst to best

SOME family members are simply better than others. Find out how yours stack up with this definitive ranking of your blood relatives.

Date produces pre-relationship Christmas present waiver to sign

A MAN has presented his date with a legal document indemnifying both parties, should they progress to a relationship, from Christmas 2022 presents.

'We’ll go to that place you like after': How your partner tricks you into awful events

RELATIONSHIPS are all about compromise, which means you have to go to events you'll hate. Here’s how your scheming partner will make you think it'll be okay.

Man not attractive or rich enough to act like dickhead

AN ARSEHOLE is not nearly hot or wealthy enough to justify his prickish behaviour, it has been confirmed.

The memory of your first shag vs the reality

IN your mind, the experience of losing your virginity was a tender, romantic revelation. In reality, it was awful. Here's how you've misremembered it.

Completely unrealistic old crushes your partner is pining over

IS your partner glum and distant? They might be pondering how their life would have turned out if they’d married someone else. Here are some of their alternate universe spouses.

'Is this good?' man asks while rubbing girlfriend's knee in hunt for elusive clitoris

DURING their weekly bout of intercourse, a man mistakenly believed he had finally found his girlfriend’s clitoris, he has revealed.

Do you actually like your oldest friends or is it too late to change now?

DO you have mates that you presume you must like because you’ve known them since secondary school? Here’s how to tell if there’s nothing there apart from longevity.

Man's complex maths justifying age-gap with girlfriend solid foundation for relationship

A 39-YEAR-OLD man dating a 22-year-old woman has a mathematical formula that explains why it is perfectly fine.

Selling their parents' house, and other shit the youngest child can get away with

EVERY parent holds their children to the highest standards, until they get to the last one who’s a precious little darling living a consequence-free life. They get away with this shit.