Relationships

A MAN is growing increasingly concerned that his 29-year-old girlfriend is actually an 80-year-old woman in disguise.

DADS have an uncanny ability to say things that make you want to curl up and die. Here 55-year-old accountant Stephen Malley lists some of his favourite expressions for putting his foot in it.

AFTER the early, exciting stage of your relationship, sex will become a chore to get done or a Plan B for when other activities fall through. Here’s why you’ll reluctantly do it.

Moving in with your partner is blissful, apart from the moment when discover they've got rid of some of your most cherished possessions. Here are some of the things you'll lose:

WHAT do the stars predict for your Valentine's Day? Here is a very definite and not-at-all made up insight into the most romantic day of the year.

A MOTHER of identical twins has confirmed that she finds them just as profoundly weird as the rest of society does.

LOVING parents never tell you their child is an irritating, destructive little shit and instead use words like ‘spirited’ instead. Here are some other euphemisms.

ARE you trying to keep the romantic spark alive with Julian, Francesca or Oliver? Read our foolproof guide to sending a sexy but suitably middle class SMS message.

A CHILLED-OUT girlfriend fully aware that Valentine’s Day is a corporate moneymaking scam expects chocolates and a bouquet regardless.

DO conversations with your parents always veer off into heated, toxic confrontations? Keep chats upbeat with these topics it's safe to discuss.