Relationships

AFTER almost a year of no human contact, which household items are starting to lead you on for a steamy night of consensual passion?

A MAN who has arrived within a 3.6 mile radius of his house instantly knows that his partner is in a foul mood.

DO you gather strength from your hatred of others, but should have grown out of it by now? Here are enemies you’re officially allowed to have as an adult.

A 27-YEAR-OLD man is already planning the selfish ways he will mark his mid-life crisis to ensure fun for himself and misery for his partner.

A PANICKED woman has texted 28 friends to canvas their opinions on what the ‘hello’ she received from a Tinder match could mean.

COUPLES across Britain have agreed that showering together is neither satisfyingly sexy or cleansing.

SOMEONE dropped the L-bomb out of the blue? Stuck for a response? Check out these half-dozen ways to let them down easy (for you).

A MAN has returned from the supermarket with all 12 items that his girlfriend requested, each of them wrong.

A WOMAN'S romantic evening meal has been ruined by the presence of her prick of a boyfriend.

BRITONS have decided that ‘bubble’ is too cosy a term for a grim huddle of bored people stuck indoors with only each other for company.