Society

A MAN who stole your lunch money in year four by threatening to beat you up now teaches businesses how to be more mindful.

HAVE you got a friend who gives you ‘too much information’ about everything from medical problems to their sex life? Read our guide to making them stop.

THE sane value of the vast majority of London flats is roughly £2,000, it has emerged.

A MIDDLE-CLASS boy has been told he can grow up to be whatever he wants to be, as long as it earns at least six figures.

THE unbelievably ridiculous state opening of Parliament may offer a clue as to why the UK has problems, experts have claimed.

THE Queen is to announce the legalisation of cannabis, against the government's wishes.

MILITANT vegans blockading the meat aisles of a supermarket have been scattered by a delicate but deliberate draught of air.

TRAIN passengers have called for services to include a dedicated wanker carriage where wankers can go about their business in peace.

OPENING a jar that nobody else has been able to open is better than achieving orgasm through intercourse.

A WOMAN who does not currently have angry, weird arguments with  strangers is thinking about joining Twitter.