Society

A MAN who gets furious about the idea of paying slightly more tax has been told he can perform his own heart operations and tarmac some roads.

A MAN who has abstained from masturbation for 72 hours is acting as if he is the saviour of all mankind.

I write to complain that my daughter Ellie’s recent science project, which I put a lot of effort into, has received no recognition whatsoever.

A TAXI driver is no longer even keeping up the pretence that he is concentrating on driving two tons of car and is busy doing other things.

A MOTHER-OF-TWO who had a rare moment of peace and quiet has been staggered by how inane her thoughts are.

A BABY'S habit of crying and defecating constantly are part of his 'quirky personality', it has been confirmed.

WOULD you like to be one of those annoying friends who gives terrible advice about situations you don’t understand? Follow this guide.

DO you feel you’re being unfairly attacked for being a baby boomer, despite believing anyone with a grievance is a ‘snowflake’? Here’s what to do.

SPLASHING water everywhere while driving along waterlogged roads is the key to peak happiness in adulthood, a survey has found.

A MAN has just remembered that living in Britain between the beginning of November and the end of February is a total f**king nightmare.