Society

A SURVEY to find the world’s friendliest city has been told in no uncertain terms that it is London, unless the researchers have a problem with that.

A STUDENT is celebrating getting the first ‘A with a shitload of stars’ grade at A Level.

A WOMAN is annoyed after sending all her friends a helpful link to erection pills and not getting any response.

PLANS to tackle childhood obesity have been scaled back because the money has been spent on winning Olympic cycling medals

A MAN has experienced weird stirrings of patriotism while watching the Olympics.

A WOMAN is always available to listen to her friends’ problems and give them spectacularly shit advice.

A RETIRED couple spent three days on a coach because that is their twisted idea of fun.

A TATTOO claiming ‘Only God can judge me’ has been proved wrong by a district judge.

A WOMAN with a spare gig ticket has offered it to her best friend at full face value plus booking fee.

FANS of Desert Island Discs fans are reeling from the news that some people are ghastly.