Society

TERRIFYING online collective Mumsnet has revealed a predilection for high-grade online filth.

THE Campaign for Common Sense Clamping scored a fresh victory last night as a clamper was killed and his mutilated body put on display as a warning to others.

CRIME-FIGHTING grandmother Margaret Gerving has declared war on wrongdoers, especially black people and Germans.

FAT, happy children who eat pizza do not waste time asking annoying, smart-arse questions, research has discovered.

BRITISH multiculturalism officially collapsed yesterday after Mrs Patel neglected to return a Catherine Cookson book belonging to her white neighbour, Margaret Gerving.

LAST year saw a record increase in the number of obvious lies about embarrassing surgery scars.

WOMEN should be entitled to half of their boyfriend's disgusting pile of crap in the event of a split, according to a landmark ruling.

BRITAIN is the angry, racist, old widower who lives in that decrepit house at the end of the street, the UN has confirmed.

YOUNG people's obsession with the internet could spell the end for traditional pastimes like watching Home and Away, according to new research.

THE government has unveiled a street by street crime map of the UK as part of a new initiative to keep you nicely terrified.