Society

WITH inflation rising, incomes stagnant and the cost-of-living crisis deepening, an insane scheme to ‘tax the rich’ has been put forward by fringe economists.

THE ‘culture war’ which has raged across the UK for the last couple of years is now looking like it was just wankers on both sides, the nation has realised. 

HAVING a minimum GCSE requirement for getting into university unfairly penalises children who discover getting shitfaced on Frosty Jack’s before the age of 16, it has been claimed.

A SMALL woman with a massive umbrella is loving scattering people into gutters as she strides down pavements, she has confirmed.

A DRIVER who kindly allowed another car to pull out ahead of him is now cleared to be a complete prick to everyone he encounters today.

YOU all think you’re so clever with your ‘qualifications’ and your fancy jobs. Well, I’ve made £600k on my house by sitting on my arse. So who’s clever now?

EVER since the health-and-safety brigade got their way, British lifespans have vastly increased at the price of our freedom. What happened to these dangers?

DARE to criticise youth culture and you’ll immediately be accused of turning into your dad. But what if some aspects have genuinely got worse? Like these…

FOOD bills are rising thanks to the Tories’ poor management of the economy. So naturally the Daily Mail feels it’s your responsibility to eat more cheaply. Here are their helpful tips.

INTO your third decade of existence? Brace yourself for these disappointments, which are also rites of passage.