Society

A COMPLETE and total dickhead actually has big hopes for the coming year.

CHRISTMAS is a time for doing things you’ve done so many times before that you hate them. Here are some traditions you’d love to see the back of.

AN ARTIFICIAL Christmas tree is jealous of real Christmas trees because they are allowed to die.

YULETIDEOLOGISTS have long agreed that 70s Christmases were the best. This judgement by men in their late 50s is objective fact. Here’s why.

YOUR parents’ house cannot accommodate you, your sister, your brother, his wife and their kids, so you’re sleeping on one of these.

LOOKING forward to the tedium of talking to arseholes who love Christmas trivia? Here are some well-known facts you’ll have patronisingly explained to you.

SINCE darts fans, of all people, have declared themselves Boris Johnson-haters, here are some other unlikely groups with a sudden antipathy toward the PM. 

IF CATHOLICISM ever wants to be as big as BTS, it needs an upgrade and new saints to pray to. Which ones do we need the most?

YOU can’t put a price on family, apart from at this time of year when you’re forced to. How much should you spend on each relative?

THE government has brought Christmas Day forward to tomorrow and full lockdown to first thing Wednesday, they have confirmed.