War

THE new Cold War with Scotland has intensified with the discovery of radio transmitters in shortbread.

DAVID Cameron has insisted bombing Libya and then forgetting about it was an act of statesmanship.

THE Tories have pledged to spend £100bn on a new batch of nuclear weapons and use them.

RUSSIA’S new supersonic bomber is part of its bid to have all the best Top Trumps cards, according to experts.

BRITAIN is recoiling from news that 'Jihadi John' was, from the age of six to 18, a child who attended school.

34-YEAR-OLD Norman Steele has been left traumatised after his army of space marines was wiped out during a tabletop wargame.

IF the Chilcot report into the Iraq War is released before the general election it could be killed by a late frost, it has been claimed.

GAY recruits to the armed forces will be asked what kind of gay they are so it can be weaponised.

BRITONS have given their full support to any activity that involves stealth bombers.

WORLD War One has been declared Britain’s most on-trend conflict thanks to its nice coats and haircuts.