Arts & Entertainment

A BRITISH human being is not counting down the days until the start of a show about cakes.

A MIDDLE-AGED bank manager who owns a replica Stormtrooper helmet has called millennials still into Harry Potter ‘pathetic’.

THE UK had no idea that him off Casualty, the one who’s been in it for years, took it home in a f**king wheelbarrow.

CHANNEL Five has revealed the salaries of the woman who chooses the programmes and the man who pixelates the breasts.

TOP BBC stars should be earning between £25,000 and £38,000 a year, on a sliding scale, licence payers have agreed.

ED Sheeran is now a Game of Thrones character and unable to return to the real world, the show’s producers have confirmed.

SENIOR Tories have been watching Game of Thrones for tips on how they can make things worse, it has been confirmed.

A RADIO 4 listener whose radio suddenly died was able to recreate the experience by getting a talkative posh friend to come round.

ALL women should have a little black dress, pencil skirt, all-season blazer and a Guns ’N Roses t-shirt in their wardrobe, fashion magazines have decreed.

THE actor and singer-songwriter Tom Waits has emerged as the frontrunner to be the new voice of Muppet-in-chief, Kermit the Frog.