Environment

THE hypocrisy of climate change protesters has been exposed after one was filmed inhaling oxygen and exhaling greenhouse gases.

EXTINCTION Rebellion has issued a formal apology and disbanded after having some sense shouted into them by an angry van driver.

WASPS are nasty little bastards because they suffer from low self-esteem and confidence, experts have confirmed.

A MAN extremely irate about climate protesters blocking roads just shrugs when flash floods do it instead.

EXCITED for September? Of course not. The ninth month of the year is an annual lesson in misery and disappointment.

CRACKING a window gets fresh air in, but this parade of six-legged bastards won’t be far behind. These are the usual hellish suspects.

NATURE is truly beautiful, until one of these nightmares happens that makes you involuntarily retch.

YOU won’t find anyone more opposed to climate change than me. I recycle, I haven’t flown since 2019, and my next car will be electric.

A MAN is unable to decide whether it is more important to fight for the future of humanity or to fight for Geronimo the sad alpaca.

DO you feel guilty and powerless in the face of the climate crisis, or do you deny it outright? Environmentalist Tom Logan and mentalist Roy Hobbs debate.