Health

MUMMIES are very thirsty for their special Ribena in the afternoon, children have confirmed.

A COMPLETELY awful man likes to tell people that his frequent visits to the gym make him better at sex.  

CO-WORKERS have been told they do not have to cough as much as they are coughing and that they are probably doing it for attention.

GOING to hospital? That’s your right as a British citizen, until further notice, but before you step past the smokers at the doors you should know what the risks are.

DELIGHTED colleagues have confirmed that every single one of them has had the horrendous cold that never stops over the whole of Christmas.

PARENTS have been urged to stop wasting healthy, home-cooked food on their dreadful children.

AN OFFICE worker has called in sick for the second day on the trot so that no one will ever know he didn't have what he’s calling ‘a nasty bug’.

A WOMAN who is really happy to ‘go with the flow’ also won’t eat anything without first thoroughly inspecting the ingredients list.

EVANGELISTS for the wonders of coffee have become even more intolerable after scientists confirmed it is good for your health.

A MOTHER has streamlined her wine consumption by feeding it directly into her bloodstream.